What's more interesting to me though, is when the religion is shared, but the degree of devotion is not. An strange reality is that often a difference in degree can be just as alienating, and sometimes more so. When I was in the military, I made the mistake (only a couple of times) of saying that I didn't swear because I was a Christian. My friends would look at me quizzically, a little offended, and ask me what I meant - they were Christians too.
Which made the rest of the conversation a wee bit awkward.
The truth is, believers put so much importance on the differences that distinguish their own spirituality that when they encounter someone who disagrees, they have trouble reconciling the validity of that disagreement. And its even harder when that person tries to say that there isn't a difference.
Is praying once a week just as good as praying every day? Reading the Bible once a year versus reading it before every meal? The obvious answer would seem to be that more equals better. Except then we're associating what we do with spiritual excellence. And when we do that, we enter very dangerous territory.
So my thought with this story is what would it be like if Jesus was an actual person hanging out with a married couple? It sounded somewhat delightfully awkward, so I decided it simply had to be written.
Enjoy!
~~~
Third Wheel
Tania lay in
her nightgown, held softly in Jordan’s arms.
Her eyes were closed, and she sang just above a whisper, “You satisfy … ˮ Her voice drifted off and she breathed
deeply, adjusting her body closer to him.
“You satisfy – ˮ
“Good morning, honey.” Brian walked into the room, glancing at his
wife.
She opened sleepy eyes and
smiled, “Hey.” Her voice moved slowly
and opened into a yawn.
“How’d you
sleep?”
“I had a
nightmare, came out to Jordan. I fell
asleep feeling we were so close,” she turned adoring eyes to the man holding
her, “You’re amazing, you know that?”
Jordan gave
her a squeeze, then helped her stand up.
She went to her husband and gave him a long kiss on the lips. “And how did my husband sleep?”
“Well enough,”
He gently pulled away to walk into the kitchen and start the coffee maker and
fill its carafe. “But got to get out the
door whether I’m rested or not.” He
glanced across the room at Jordan and chuckled, “Can’t just sit around all day
helping people, now can I?”
“It may not
pay as well,” Jordan answered, “But you could.”
“That’s such
a great idea!” Tania brightened, “It’s inspired! You should totally stay home today.”
Brian
laughed hesitantly. Then picked a whole
grain cereal that promised him boundless energy. “Maybe some other time. There’s a meeting today I can’t miss.”
“Oh.” Tania pursed her lips, “Then bring him with
you. He’ll help you get through it.”
Her husband
looked mildly startled at the suggestion, “Uh, no. Thanks.
As great as Jordan is here at home, he never fits all that well at the
office.” He shrugged apologetically, “Fish
out of water. Not to mention how
uncomfortable he makes some of my coworkers.
You remember how it went last time.”
“But that
wasn’t Jordan’s fault, it – ˮ
“I didn’t say it was! But – well, some people just can’t stand
being around him.” He spread his hands, “I
know it’s not fair, but that’s the world we live in. We can’t force people accept him.”
“Fine,” she watched him fill a
thermos with coffee, and eat the last of his cereal. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. As he walked out he glanced at Jordan and
nodded, “Catch you later.”
“Later.” Jordan replied.
*
“I just feel he doesn’t take you
seriously.”
Jordan sat calmly on the
toilet. Hands folded and legs crossed,
he leaned against the tank and listened to Tania’s voice over the fall of
shower water. His clothes grew faintly
damp in the steam as she continued.
“He says he loves you as much as
I do, but he doesn’t spend as much
time with you. I feel like you’re just a
hobby to him.” She poked her head around
the edge of the shower curtain and pointed an accusing finger, “He needs you at
the office just as much as he needs you here at home, he just won’t admit it.” The shower curtain jerked back in place, “I
don’t understand why you won’t speak up when he goes on like that. Just explain to him why he needs to spend
more time with you.”
She turned off the water and
sighed as she pulled the curtain aside, “I guess I just want him to see you
like I see you.” She smiled at him as
she started to dry herself off, “Thanks for listening.
Jordan smiled sadly and nodded.
*
“Jordan’s great, don’t get me
wrong,” Brian leaned against the wall in the break room, sharing time with
Kenneth the actuary. “I love the
guy. But every waking moment it’s ‘Jordan
this’ and ‘Jordan that’. It’s a little
much, you know?”
Kenneth nodded sagely, then
turned his attention back to his tuna sandwich.
“For once I’d like to spend time
with her alone. No Jordan. Just the two of us.” He sighed and looked at his watch, “Gotta get
back to it. Thanks for the talk, Ken.”
Kenneth the actuary glanced up
chewing a mouthful of white bread and albacore, watching Brian leave the
room. He rolled his eyes and continued
his lunch.
*
Tania paced
the kitchen while Jordan chopped carrots for her salad. “I really think you should talk to him. It’ll sound better coming from you than
coming from me. Just explain to him that
you’re an important part of my life and I want him to share that. I feel like there’s this distance between us,
and that if we could completely agree on how important you should be to our
lives, then we’d be close again.”
Jordan
glanced at her skeptically.
“It’d be a
start!” She protested. “Sure it won’t fix all our problems, but we
can’t be perfect like you,” she
hugged herself, “Normal people have to work things through one at a time.”
Jordan was
quiet for a long moment, “I’ll talk to him.”
“Really? Right now?” Tania grinned, “I knew you would!”
*
Brian typed
away at his keyboard, processing a client’s order. A small clock hung from the wall of his
cubicle. He didn’t need to glance at it
to know that he went home in two hours.
He thought maybe he could stop somewhere for a drink before he got home.
“Hello,
Brian.”
He jumped,
pounding his knees upward into his desk and making his monitor jump. “Christ, you scared me! What the hell, Jordan?!”
“I came to
see you. Is the meeting over?”
“Yeah, uh,”
he shifted his weight uncomfortably, “It was this morning. But what are you doing here, I thought we
decided I was going to work alone.”
Jordan
sighed, “Why did you lie to Tania about the meeting, Brian?”
He blinked, “Well. Because.”
He frowned, “You can’t just ditch work, Jordan. But my wife, God love her, doesn’t see things
that way. Your word is more important
than my common sense.” He took a deep
breath and shook his head, “Which is fine, whatever. But I don’t have to agree with her.”
“You didn’t
have to lie to her either.”
“And start a
fight?” he sniffed, “Not likely. Now are
you done? I have work to do.”
“Why don’t
you want me to stay, Brian?”
“Because you
don’t belong here!” he shouted, causing the bustle of the office to slow as
they looked his way, “This is a place of business. Not of whatever hokum pokum you came to stir
up. Now please. Leave.”
Jordan
nodded, a weary look on his face. And
left.
*
When Brian got home that night, Tania met him in the living room. “Hey, honey.
How was – ˮ
“Did you
send Jordan to work?” His face was tight
with outrage, “Why would you do that, when I explicitly told you not to.”
“You didn’t
tell me not to. And with that tone, you
should have kept him there. It might
have improved your mood.”
“I don’t need
you to fix my mood, Tania! I need you to
respect my boundaries. Jordan is to stay
here. In the house, at church, with
those friends that like him, and that’s
it! Anywhere else, and he’s crossing
a line.”
“Who’s
line?!”
“Mine!”
“Oh, that’s
fresh. And all those times you insisted
he was important to you too; that you loved him too. I guess you were just lying to my face! Well, thank
you, for finally speaking your mind.”
“I wasn’t lying! But if you think that means I fawn over his
every word, then you have a different definition of love than I do. You obsess
over him more than you actually love him.”
“How dare you!”
“Sometimes I
think you’d be happier if you’d married him instead of me.”
Tania turned
pale, and stormed away from him.
“Tania,”
Brian frowned, “Tania!” He followed her.
Jordan sat
on the couch and listened to the shouting continue further into the house. He walked to the front door. He looked over his shoulder, eyes wet, then
left.
*
